A Fantastic Reality

I promised I would tell y’all a bit more about my recent vacation to Mexico and tonight seems like a good night to keep promises.

My boyfriend and I have been together, solidly, for just over three years. We had a rough beginning, took a break, got back together, took another (longer) break, then realized that we didn’t want to do life without each other. Well, I realized that. He already knew. But to celebrate our three-year anniversary, I planned a special vacation to commemorate it.

He’s told me for years that he has wanted to go on a cruise. About a year ago, I started planning it. To be honest, I went with a seven-day cruise to Mexico because it was a decent length vacation that wasn’t ridiculously expensive. But it was so much better than I could have hoped for…

I didn’t tell him about it until I had it paid off. He’d only want to help pay for it, and I wanted to do something special for him and for us. (He does plenty of things for me all of the time. I wanted to be the one to do this.) When I told him, though, he was so excited, like a kid being told he could have cake and ice cream for breakfast. I planned everything based around what I knew he liked and thought he’d enjoy.

Day One: We left early to drive to our port in New Orleans. I drove, which he is never really a fan of, so he could sleep. He worked the night before, and I wanted him to be able to rest. We got there before our set boarding time, but we were able to board early. We sat on the deck and just enjoyed being in the sun.

Day Two: We sailed all day. We walked the ship and explored what all our cruise liner had to offer. We were able to get a discount in one of the “specialty” restaurants called Choppes. We already had a couple’s deep-tissue massage booked for later in the week, but he wanted to get a softer massage to prep us for it. (Just a tip for anyone booking a cruise– book EVERYTHING ahead of time. It is about double the price if you book it during the cruise.) I’m glad we had that prep-Swedish massage, though. I was so sore after that, I knew the deep-tissue was going to be Murder on the Mexican Sea-press.

Day Three: We had our first excursion in Cozumel. We went to a theme park, XPLOR, where we got to do a 14-course zip line and underground cavern exploration. Neither of us were really prepared for how strenuous it was going to be, though. Did you know to zip line, you need to walk up a shit-ton of stairs? Well, now you do, and I learned that day just how out of shape I am. My lungs were killing me. But MY GODDESS it was fun! The zip line course ended with us zip-lining straight into water. Unfortunately, he was still wearing his pants and tennis shoes. I had my swimsuit one, but I didn’t think to remove the coverup dress I wore. We found the humor in it, thought. The cavern had stalagmites and stalactites growing around an underground pond. It was absolutely beautiful. The final event of the excursion was the largest waterslide I’d ever seen. They had to weigh us and another couple before we were allowed on. If the four of the people on the raft didn’t equal a certain amount (I believe it was around 320kg), then they would have to wait and be weighed with other people. It was the weirdest thing, but when we got to the top, we understood why. The top of the slide had an opening. If you weighed too little, the tube you and the other three are on would capsize. If you weighed too much, you wouldn’t gather enough speed to make it up the ramp. Overall, it was slightly terrifying and completely exhilarating!

When we got back on the ship, we had a little time to rest before we had our reservations at The Chef’s Table. It was a six-course meal with wine and cocktail pairings. Everything was delicious and beautifully prepared. When we finished our meal, we went to the casino that was on the ship. My boyfriend is an avid gamer. He’s very tech-savvy and is far better at calculating odds than I am. However, when it comes to slots and getting a “feel” for a good machine, he’s out of luck. We went to the casino almost every night. By the end of the trip, he walked away in the negative; I walked away with more than I brought on the trip to begin with.

Day Four: Our second excursion was in Puerta Costa Maya. We’d booked a tour of the city on a party bus. They supplied us with plenty of tequila, authentic Mexican food (Holy Hera, I thought I knew what good Mexican food was–I have been wrong for thirty years), then they dropped us off at the beach. We hit up a few shops before we made our way back to the ship.

Day Five: Our final excursion was at Belize City. Well, sort of. We stopped a few miles from shore and a ferry picked us up to take us into the city. From there, we boarded another boat to take us out deep-sea fishing. My boyfriend was so excited about this. We’d been deep-sea fishing many years ago off the coast of Florida. He’d loved it, and he’d caught several large fish. This trip wasn’t as grand as that one, though. The biggest fish caught was a Ramora (the fish that likes to hitch a ride on sharks and whales), and it had to be released. Everything else that was caught was the same kind of fish, a silk snapper. It was about the size of my hand. All of them. About an hour into fishing, it began to rain. The guide started us back in to the beach where they were going to prepare the fish we caught. We hadn’t made it back to the beach, though, before it stopped raining. Still, we got back to the beach just as two HUGE manna rays swam up. I was able to pet them. They were the cuddliest sea creatures. They loved the petting and weren’t shy at all. We swam in the clearest and most beautiful beach I’d ever been to. It was almost surreal to me. Before leaving, we ate our catch. I have no idea what they used to season it, but I don’t want ever want another fish unless it is cooked just like that. (Ok, that’s a lie. But it was so good!!)

That night we had our deep-tissue massage booked. I was genuinely a little scared. I was still sore from the Swedish massage. So, when we got to the spa, I spoke to my masseuse and asked if we could dial it back to a shallow-tissue massage. It was phenomenal. I fell asleep twice during it. My boyfriend didn’t dial his back, though. He’s pretty sure his masseuse was trying to murder him using her elbows.

Day Six: It was another day on the sea. We spent most of the day on the top deck just looking out at the ocean. No land in sight. It was humbling, really. We felt so small and insignificant. Later that night, we had our final reservation at a Japanese restaurant called Izumi. I’ve never had sushi so fresh! And though it was just raw fish, I wasn’t able to eat it all before I was bursting full. To burn some calories, we attended the 1970s themed dance party. I love dancing, but we never have the opportunity to go at home. It was so much fun, and probably my favorite memory from the vacation.

Day Seven: Our final day on the sea. It was bittersweet. Real life was about to catch up to us, but we were going to enjoy every moment of our vacation away from reality. We went to the buffet on board for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. We went to an art auction, where I got to see real Salvador Dali pieces (not just reprints). We went to the casino and won a little bit of money. My boyfriend bought himself a Spiderman Citizen watch and me a beautiful bracelet. It’s the first piece of jewelry he’d ever bought me. I love it. Later that night, we went to an onboard musical production. They sang hits from The Producers and Mama Mia. For the cruise finale, they’d planned a balloon drop and Mardi Gras party at midnight. We went for the balloon drop, but there was no getting into the crowd for the party. Afterwards, we retired to our room and ordered some room service. Honestly, I’m glad we spent those last few hours alone together while everyone else was out and about.

Day Eight: When we woke up, we were already docked back in New Orleans. Reality was setting back in, though we tried to prolong its inevitability. The drive home didn’t seem to take as long. We listened to music, talked about the trip, and I messaged my eldest daughter to let her know we were back on dry American soil.

It was an amazing experience, and one I would love to replicate. Though it wasn’t everything we’d imagined, it was perfect. I wouldn’t change a single moment of it. Getting to experience life outside of our routine was what we both needed, and we wanted to experience those moments with each other. He and I have our ups and downs, but we’ve both realized that life, our lives, are sweeter together.